Exploring News: Felony Thirst Traps

Published on: March 4th, 2020 | Last updated: March 3, 2020 | Written by: Bad Guy Joe

---

• 

Hot Felons and Where To Find Them
Yes folks, spring is in the air. Is there a better time than now to combine your love of crime and hot females?

MugShawtys features mugshot photos of attractive looking women—and some of them y’all will absolutely love. Check this one out, arrested for ‘vandalism‘, or this one, destroying property while trespassing. Looking for a blond trespasser to bring home to mom? There’s a mugshot for that. Are these women too tame for you? How about this sexy AF woman accused of attempted murderer?

All kidding aside, you should drop whatever you’re doing and go read this fab NY Post article, all about the mugshot account and the geeky looking guy behind it.

If you ever get caught, there’s a lot to be said for having a good mugshot. Take graff queen Utah for example. If you’re a guy, you’re gunna have to compete hard if you want a more badass mugshot than Hert. Too graffiti for you? William West also nailed it, repping punk urbexers hard.

Cuomo’s Snake Pit
If you’re looking for a twisted read further revealing the bottomless snake pit that is NY Governor Andrew Cuomo’s mind, just check out this micro-story on how he’s using a bus network redesign project to fuck with his opponents.

KC Real Estate Developers are Psychotic.
Kansas City is trying to tax their way out of a ‘Bando. The idea is that if they implement a tax on a small area, all of that money can go directly to a real estate developer who will clean it up. It’s basically welfare/socialism, but only for the real estate developer.

Meanwhile, a different set of developers is suing the city, stating that a broken sewer pipe lead them to abandon a supermarket filled with food. To compound the problem, their lack of any serious security measures lead to the building being ransacked. If they really gave a damn about the building, maybe they should have fixed the pipe themselves? Or, you know, secured the place? Instead they want to suck off taxpayer tiddies.

ASS: Assorted Subway Shenanigans
The Rutgers Tube, aka the F line between Manhattan and Brooklyn, will be shut down nights and weekends for its long overdue Sandy repairs.

Snobby ass Q Train riders are all annoyed they are getting reassigned some older subway cars. You should be so lucky to ride a train with big old school rollsigns!

LIZARD PEOPLE!
Famous Only In The UK (FOITUK ?) person Gemma Collins believes that lizard people live among us, and travel around the world in secret underground tunnels. We can certify that this is untrue because Steven Miller and Steve Bannon are known to travel above ground.

Shorties:
Property owners in Montgomery, Alabama have finally decided to sue whoever owns a ridiculously ugly set of long abandoned apartment buildings.

A Long Island derp DWI’ed his way into an abandoned building.

The city of Hamilton, Ohio is making a last minute effort to try saving their awesome abandoned train station.

Many Derps are still making a dangerous journey into the wilds of Alaska to see… …an abandoned bus.

The long abandoned Warwick hotel in New Orleans is going to be rebuilt as part of Tulane University.

Border Patrol goons found the 126th tunnel* carved under the US/Mexico border last week. *They started counting tunnels in 1990.

Bando BBQ
The old Mt. Tom ski area was set on fire by some Massholes.

An abandoned fire sprinkler company in Dayton, Ohio burned to the ground.

A big ole’ factory in Chattanooga caught fire twice in one day. The massive building has caught fire before, and was to be converted into apartments, though it seems the conversion never took place.

A two floor modern office ‘bando in Niles, CA caught fire again.

International Update
Fans of WW2 history will lose their shit over this massive find of looted nazi weapons, submerged near an old military installation.

A foot long fatberg was found in the UK, clogging up the works in a sewage plant.

Yikes – the Swiss don’t play when it comes to drunks caught wandering their rail tunnels.

A secret passageway was found inside British Parliament, and lucky for them. Their whole entire is crumbling and they’re gunna need some secret passages to escape the guillotines!

Italy has closed the catacombs in Rome due to Corona Virus. Seems like a mistake to me—now where are the paranoid going to run and hide?

Speaking of Corona Virus, Barbados is planning to use an abandoned military facility as a quarantine area for anyone infected…

A ‘bando “Holiday Park” in the UK has been overrun by UrBeXoRz. OMFG!

North Korea is still indeed just a hollow shell, with a labyrinth of tunnels below it, filled with lizard people!

AND THAT’S A WRAP
…when you finally start writing that novel you been sitting on for twenty five years, and realize that you’ve got far far far more interesting characters to work with now vs. back then.

Comments

NOTE: It sometimes takes a short while for comments to be approved - unfortunately there's a lot of spam comments that come in. I absolutely love when y'all share personal stories of friends relatives etc who worked in these places. It really helps capture what these places were like before they closed up shop.

If you're feeling salty, argumentative comments completely devoid of facts (supply links to support your argument) will not be published. Got a case to state? come with the details.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.