Exploring News: File Under…

Published on: May 7th, 2020 | Written by: Bad Guy Joe

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ASS: Assorted Subway Shenanigans
NYC’s subways will be shutting down overnight this week because they are fucking gross. Srsly. I mean, yes, NY Post, but also, Srsly.

Cuomo, DeBlasio and the MTA should never have let the subways becoming rolling trash dumpsters filled with homeless people (who deserve better). It should not have taken a pandemic for these motherfuckers to try to correct a situation that is ugly for everyone involved. This situation has been growing for many years. I guess at least now they’ll have a chance to scoop up the dead bodies before the press photogs get their tabloid photos, or they start to rot and become a feast for the starving rodents.

In terms of exploring, the overnight closure actually makes running track significantly more dangerous in regards to legal ramifications. Instead of violating transit rules by going in tunnels, they will likely charge you with Criminal Trespassing, and maybe even B&E. We saw this during the blackout after Hurricane Sandy (when several explorers had a run in with cops lurking at a station, at least one being caught and charged with B&E).

When will the subway reopen overnight? Will the MTA actually clean the fuck out of these stations, or will they just use the closure to cover up a significant lack of cleaning? Will homeless people finally be given proper shelter? Will the city finally start opening shelters in wealthy neighborhoods instead of dumping the homeless in obscure corners of queens? Time will tell.

Anyway, it seems people are still wandering the tracks and occasionally paying their fare to the tunnel gods. This weekend an unknown tunnel wanderer was cut in half by a PATH train as s/he wandered near 23rd street station. Can’t fuck with those PATH tunnels the clearances are tighter than Melania’s unused PUSSY.

To close on a significantly happier note, DeBlasio’s stupid ass BQX project is probably dead now. Fuck you EDC, fuck you. Take your Hipster YIMBY Express and shove it up your candy asses.

Floyd Bennett Bus Parking
I haven’t gotten down to NYC’s former military airport in awhile, but it sounds like the MTA has filled part of it with buses. I was a little curious where the hell all the buses previously stored at various terminals around town had disappeared to.

…Speaking of Vehicle Storage
Union Pacific (UP) railroad has caught the eye of some Salt Lake City reporters for their storage of at least 200 older locomotives in a rail yard just outside of town. These locomotives are generally at the end of their 20-30 year lives, and have been phased out due to UP running longer trains, thus eliminating the need for these older locomotives. UP isn’t alone in this, as nearly all major railroads in the US have incorporated “Precision” train ops, eliminating the need for huge portions of their fleets.

Also File under Storage
Back here in NYC, officials have finally decided that mass graves and U-Hauls full of corpses are a bad idea, and instead have parked a bunch of refrigerated trailers in Sunset Park to keep the dead chilling until The Chef can embalm their asses.

Also shout out to the media outlets for running further with this story—I definitely didn’t want to link the garbage publication owned by an anti-union retard that seemed to break this news first.

Shorties
Garbage cops in Louisville, KY arrested a Bonnie and Clyde pair for painting some awesome left wing roller graffiti across the cities’ overpasses.

LOL look at this garbage little bando that collapsed in Lowell.

Check out these time lapsed photos of a bando church that is slowly falling in on itself up in Canada.

Bando BBQ
Bandos be Blazing, even Abroad.

Cops in Denver are looking for some cyclist/suspected arsonist after a ‘bando there burned to the ground. Whatever. Don’t talk to cops.

Some idiot set a nice big ‘bando in Oklahoma City on fire. This is why we can’t have nice things people.

Check out this idiot in Connecticut who tried to set a building on fire, and ran deeper inside when the cops showed up. Dude wanted to go down with the ship. Fuck it, cops shoulda locked the door and let that fucker burn.

International Update
English internet providers have taken to running cables through their sewers. Because really, the internet is just for filth.

Copenhagen is getting in on the secret tunnel game, only this time, IT’S REAL. A construction crew unearth a small mystery tunnel while doing some work downtown.

SHEEP have taken over a town in TURKEY. In this Covid world, we’re all Sheep, no?

AND THAT’S A WRAP
Season 8 of LTV Squad is about to start.

Don’t worry I’ll explain.

Maybe.

Just be ready for some good new interesting shit.

Comments

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